Thursday, April 30, 2009

Gosling Update

It's only been a week, and the goslings at Rancho San Rafael are noticeably bigger. They swim a little, nap a little, but mostly they eat.

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

The Specter Trade

Republican Senator Arlen Specter was traded to the Democrats today for an undisclosed amount of cash and a governorship to be named later. In a prepared statement, Coach Harry "Silver Tongue" Reid said of the deal: "Arlen's unique abilities to drone on and on without ever coming to a point will be very helpful in the upcoming health care debate. We welcome him to our team."

Not all Republicans were happy with the deal. Maine's Olympia "White Shoes" Snowe, after expressing disappointment in not being part of the trade said, "I hope this doesn't mean that it's going to be all principles all the time now. It's so tedious. I just don't understand it. What's the point of having principles if you can't ride around in a limousine the rest of your life?"

Republican coach Mitch McConnel stated: " We really wanted to make Olympia part of the deal, but we were up against the deadline and couldn't get it done. They were only willing to give up a county commissioner seat in DeBuque for her. We just couldn't make it happen."

Team Democrat now has a virtual "Murderers Row" of gasbags to overwhelm all opposition. Coach Reid even went on to speculate that after ramming through everything everyone ever wanted, they may try to make history by redirecting the course of a tornado later this summer.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Tales from the Rue de la Noir

I spent most of the weekend shooting meaningless and mostly unusable video. One of the places I went, for no particular reason, was Lockwood, up the canyon east of town. They're building a park there called Lockwood Trailhead. It looks like it will be pretty nice, once the landscapers are finished. I also saw another set of goslings, but the parents were nervous so I couldn't get a good shot of them.

As I was leaving, I drove into the town of Lockwood, which isn't really a town but a trailer park. It's not half bad, as trailer parks go, but I had to laugh at the street names. They're all in French. There's names like Avenue de Colours and Ave de la Argent. I believe that should be Ave de L'Argent, but what do I know. My knowledge of the French language is roughly equivalent to that of your average Trailer Park Planning Commissioner. Apparently, whoever names these things believes that fancy French names add glamour and status. They don't. They do however, force you to explain why you live on a street with an idiotic name. The conversation might go something like this:

Person 1: So, where you livin' now?
Person 2: I'm over on the Avenue Da Champs Da Leezay.
Person 1: (pause) What?
Person 2: I say I'm over on the Avenue Da Champs Da Leezay.
Person 1: (pause) Where the hell is that?
Person 2: It's the trailer park.
Person 1: Oh.
Person 2: Yeah, when you get there, just keep goin' straight and it's just past Rudy Culldisack Street.
Person 1: OK.

My personal favorite in Lockwood is the Rue de la Noir. I could imagine drunken dance hall girls careening down the dark, foggy street, and being a trailer park, may not be too far off the mark. Could a modern day Toulouse Lautrec be sitting in his driveway, painting portraits of lawn gnomes while discussing the philosophy of country music with his neighbors? Would the spectre of Edgar Allen Poe appear through the early morning mist? I don't know, but it's a great name for a video series. The challenge will be, to find something the least bit entertaining in Lockwood.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Reno's New Arrivals

Yep, it's definitely springtime.

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Memo To The Grasshopper

I regret to inform you that your job as mascot of Local So-And-So is being phased out. You have done your duty well, my little friend, but the situation has changed. The world turns, and time is a friend to no living thing. It's not even a friend to a picture of a living thing. At least, I assume you were alive when your picture was taken. Anyway, plans for the entire stock photography library have been put on indefinite hold.

As I'm sure you're aware, the blogoshere being what it is, we all need to keep pace with the times. As we transition to original content, your arrangements in the hard drive will remain the same. Remember, communicators never say "good-bye", only "see you later,", or words to that effect. I will always admire your symmetry, your simple forthrightness, to say nothing of those cute little antennae. But we must part ways. Both you and the hippopotamus will still be invited to the company picnic.


Local So-And-So
Purveyor of Fine Quality Social Media

Saturday, April 18, 2009

Reid Fundraiser Protest Video

Duty called and I was stuck at work on Wednesday, so I missed the TEA Party protest. I managed to swing by the Harry Reid fundraiser later that day. It was reported that Republican Mayors Bob Cashell of Reno and Geno Martini of Sparks would be at the Democratic Senator's fundraiser. Naturally, a few Republicans were a little annoyed with that. Of course, I muffed the money-shot of Mayor Martini leaving the building with a sheepish grin on his face. Maybe it's just as well, unlike Mayor Cashell, Martini at least had the guts to exit from the front door.

Monday, April 13, 2009

Homemade Charts

Yeah, it's been quiet around here lately- a little too quiet. In between messing with my new camera, video editing demos, and format conversion programs, I've reached one of my long-term goals; making my own charts. My method was to start with the most grandiose idea I could imagine, and as the number of failures mounted, work my way down to the simplest thing possible.

dollar value history_411_image001
This chart shows the Consumer Price Index (CPI) measured against the value of the 1793 dollar. In other words, if you had earned $100 in 1793, the first year of production for the US Mint, you could have bought $100 worth of stuff. But, if you had saved that money until 1794, how much stuff could you have bought then? What about 1795, 1796, and so on, until 2008.

There are several points of interest in this method that I'll be exploring in more detail later. One hears economists talk of the strength of the dollar today, but this is true only if it is measured against other currencies. It is a subjective value measured on a subjective scale. The year 1793 provides a point of reference for an objective scale. The dollar's value has always been, and will always be, subjective. It's the nature of the beast.

Saturday, April 4, 2009

Japanese Robot Women To Invade Moon

Hardly a week goes by that I don't see a story regarding Japanese Robot Women. This time, they are preparing to land on the moon.

Photo from Drudge Report

I can think of only three reasons for the Japanese Robot Women phenomenon:
a) Japanese scientists really need to get out more
b) Critical equipment can only be located in the area of the bust line
c) Both a and b are true

I'm beginning to think the Japanese scientific community owes the world an explanation. Shouldn't the leaders of NOW be raising concerns about this? As yet, there's no word on whether or not the moon rocket will be equiped with dual nosecones.

And here's another one. A Japanese Robot Man, named "Adam" has made his own scientific discovery involving yeast enzymes. But, not to worry. Adam is only a prototype. Eve is under construction. According to her creator:
“Eve is better designed and more elegant.”

Well, being better designed kind of goes without saying, doesn't it fella's? And elegance, everybody knows Japanese Robot Men are obnoxious brutes. They can't even tell the difference between a soup spoon and a soup ladle. They'd probably drink out of the gravy boat if left unsupervised. Yes, better to send the Japanese Robot Women to check the place out and make sure it's OK for the Japanese Robot Children. There's no telling what the moon would end up looking like if the Japanese Robot Men landed first.